Excitement overload.

Finally, we're going to practice our BollyBhangara dance tomorrow. It's a major surprise for my BIG BABY; patti's 80* birthday party :) My grandma has given me more than I want, molding me into who I am today. So I decided to dance to surprise her.

She better love it, HAHA I know she hates Bollywood because my Hindi is improving & TAMIL, it stays very bad. She is going to be annoyed but I am gonna make her say BOLLYWOOD is cool :D HEEEE <3

My costume is otw :) & I am excited. 

Oh yes I can

  Oh yes I can. :) A simply motto yet it comes with a strong meaning & impact of course. Yes, back then I was always emo & emo & emo. Oh crap, but come to think about it, all those tears I wasted, all those hours & tissues I wasted, Oh God, the tissue company did earn much from me, and poor trees got cut to manufacture more & more tissues. Ah crap.

    Yes there was time I was really down & all. I kept complaining & cry & cry & cry. But there's this two girl, one who have never met me & the other my BEST BUDDY, all their talks & motivation brought me up again :D I am standing tall now thanks to the duo.

My pretty best friend :) I love her endlessly.

Through this whole breaking down experience I learnt a lot, how to forgive & forget. I never knew Forgiving & Forgetting is just the best remedy. I did able to move on & LOL more than usual. Making new friends losing shittys and ll. But what matter most is I am happy & so are they. 

It's really tough when you'd a bunch of backstabbing friends, but it's really nice to know I found who are my true friends. :) It may be a small group but when I need them they are going to be right there for me.

In fact, I became even closer to my family members :) Things which I have never done. I am getting closer to him too, I guess. :) And all this little things makes me more than happy & most of all, I stop blaming God but start thanking God. :)

I wasn't really a holy girl & all but today I am an ardent believer of God & everyday I thank Him for every moment of my life :) 

To all those heart broken, :) you never should give up :) Yes being strong is tough but if you'd not give a try, you wouldn't know how the future is :) Adios. 

A note for you.

Hye? I wanna tell so much things, but I just don't know where to begin, how to begin & all. As much as you are fed-up of me, I'm fed-up of crying everyday. As much as you're having fun now, I also want to have fun. I know I've done mistakes & lately was so into my problems. I'm sorry. I just couldn't be perfect. I am trying every now and then. It's so clueless. It's so hard to face the fact you've dumped me & do what you did. Sometimes the ignorance you gave hurts more. It's hurts when you say your love faded away. I'm sorry. I didn't try my best to be the best for you. Sometimes, I just don't get it, why I'm not over the blues. I realized that you're no longer mine. There won't be a second chance & that you're gone forever. But the memories, keep hunting. I just couldn't forget every single words you say to me, how we joke around till late nights & the stupid arguments. You changed so did I. I accepted the fact you're the new you. I adapted to it. Sometimes, I hurt you by my words & you hurt me by actions. I'm sorry. I know, I sound stupid, desperate and all, but yeah, I truly love you & that's why I am being so. It's not easy to just sweep in with any other guys. I'm still changing & hoping for miracle. I couldn't care less anymore, because I honestly love you. The worst feeling in the world is when you can’t love anyone else, because your heart still belongs to the one who broke it.  

Will there be another chance? To get things right? Will there still be hope? :C Will there still be love in you? I'll wait.

Miss You

3rd day since i torture myself not to text you. 8 days since we broke up. 192 hours since I missed you.

It's just so hard to be here thinking why & why. Moonu is up tonight. & Gosh seeing the name Moonu itself makes me want to break down :(

It's really hard to go through this. I'm trying my best to be happy but you just keep running into my mind.

It's really hard to forget all this shits & Idk.

Ilovethepain

It's good to know that happiness are just bullshit. So is happy ending. What's the point of living when you know you are about to loose your life? :/ I am like n a puzzle. You love me or not :/ It's freaking my head out. Idk what have I done till I don't deserve a shit in life.

Was it nice the feeling? :) Seeing me hurt! Seeing me crying every night! And you're having fun up and down ? :) When I ask, you will say 'you don't deserve me. It's better we break u & blablabal' Then what's the point I'm being sincere to you for months? Being honest to you. Giving you my whole heart. Perhaps to some idiots, it's very easy to replace him. HAHA Well you're one of the idiots. If you had understand what love really means, there's no way you could find replacement even thought of replacement. 

I just hate you for everything but bullhit of me for still loving you.

This pain is really enjoyable! i mean it's funny and interesting! How he can go on acting like love me but... You'll understand when karma taps you ass :)